Ask Ping!
Friday, December 9, 2011 | 9:15 AM
ODI dates back to the 1980’s as the leader in grip manufacturing. Focusing primarily on the bmx and mountain bike industries through the 90’s and early 2000’s, ODI re-entered the motocross scene when they developed the patented lock-on grip system that eliminates wire and glue. Continuing to advance the way riders hold on to their bikes, ODI has worked closely with the teams they support such as Troy Lee Designs to create the product that is now being used by some of the top teams in the industry.
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PrintDear Ping,
Our best buddy Bryan used to ride and hang out with us back in the day. He was fast too; A former local pro and a silver medallist at the ISDE. Unfortunately, like a lot of guys out there, he got married and had a couple of kids. Now he won't ever ride with us or even hang out. He lives in constant fear of his wife. He recently bought a 2012 KTM 350 (I know, we think he's crazy too) but he has yet to come ride with us. He always has a "honey-do list", or rather a "honey-don't list", or is taking care of the kids while his wife drives around in her SUV that he pays for. What can we do to get our buddy Bryan back? Please help...
Depressed in Denver,
Joe & DJ
Really, Nick Cannon. Really? So whipped.
This is a sad and all-too-common scenario these days. Well, it’s common in developed, modern countries anyway. I don’t suppose guys living in rural African villages who speak in clicks and pops and scavenge for food and potable water all day are really worried about how much time they get with their “Bros.” Things like food, shelter and malaria are likely higher on the priority list than getting some much-deserved saddle time on their new KTM. I don’t mean to belittle your situation or force-feed you some big-picture perspective because it sounds like your pal has definitely been neutered by a man-eating women who is slowly sapping his will to live. I’m guessing that as difficult as this has been for you it is much worse for Bryan. Maybe you should just talk to him about it and come up with a solution before he loses his mind and mows her down with that SUV he’s paying for and never gets to drive. Good luck.
PING
Ping,
If you were in bed between Elton John and Jennifer Aniston, who would you turn your back on?
Chris Poole
England
I don't think he's gay- Nobody
I thought about this for quite a while. It’s like one of those trick questions where there is no right answer. Round and round I go inside my head trying to figure out if I want to be pole-to-pole with Elton John or turn my back on Mr. “Rocket Man” and be distracted by Brad Pitt’s ex. Both options are equally disturbing. Finally, I came to the conclusion that I don’t have to answer that. There’s no reason at all that I should find myself in bed with those two and if I did I probably have bigger problems than making that choice. Nice try though.
PING
Dear Ping,
Recently a social science student approached me and asked for my opinion on ideas for his thesis regarding people’s adverse reactions to written statements that they don’t agree with. I suggested he attend the Daytona 500 wearing a T-shirt that said, “Dale Earnhardt was a gay draft dodger”. Or perhaps Anaheim 1 wearing one that said, “ Jeremy McGrath couldn’t ride a tricycle” or the flight museum with one that said, “ Chuck Yeager couldn’t fly a paper airplane.” He was thrilled with the idea and ran off to have his shirts made and order his tickets. I think he will get all the input he needs for his paper and have plenty of time to write it during his recovery.
My question to you is how do you think it will go for him and do you have any ideas?
Thanks,
Duc996
Ouch. But think of the education he got.
I love hearing about a young mind motivated to get out into the world and learn. The naivety and zeal they have for seeking answers is so sweet you just can’t quite bring yourself to stop them from running headlong into the physical and emotional beat-down that inevitably comes. Do I have ideas for this sweetheart of a boy? Absolutely. Go to Canada and start shouting, “Hockey is for dorks” on any street corner. Go to Afghanistan with “Mohammad can suck it” printed on your turban. Go to Asterisk with a hat that says “Chuck Sucks.” Go to Ryan Hughes house with a shirt that says, “ I simply don’t agree with you.” These are all provocative options and could potentially start a riot. I think our studious little friend is going to come away from all this with two things. One: A fantastic understanding at mans lack of understanding when it comes to varying beliefs. Two: Flesh wounds. Hope he knows a good doctor.
PING
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Good stuff again.
The right answer to the Elton John and Jennifer Aniston question is take the pillows put them between you and elton and tell him if he moves them or even thinks about touching you he will die, Then roll over and face Jen and take care of business.
I bet BillC would say "hey Rocket Man, trade me sides"
would anyone even notice a 60 somthing year old gay guy if you where in bed with jennifer aniston? now picture yourself in this situation substituting jenn with Rosie Odonnel,now thats a disturbing "who'd you rather".
Good point zook250. The problem is that he would notice you. And bringing up Rosie is just hurltastic. I saw that Nip/Tuck episode- gross.
I got a chuckle out of the last on because last winter I had a mail carier that wore a turbin. Ok first of all there is a verse in the koran that says "beware of the eagle" or some stuff to that effect. I have a great big eagle mounted on a post next to my front door. My mailbox is next to my front door. I have a sticker on my glass on the screen door tha says "Terroist hunting permit nbr 9111" he showed up again a few days before Christmas and I gave him a card that says "Jesus Saves Merry Christmas" and had a candy cane tapped to the card. I have never saw him since??? Have no idea why???
there's a lot of white trash homophobes on here huh
with a name like peechy im guessing you would have no problem turning your back to sir elton huh
Mr. Welker, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.
@
peelout... Billy Madison!!!
Mr Ping , once again you come correct about the pusification of the american male. This sad nad destroying disease can sometimes not even be cured by a new KTM. Try using a 0'12 Kaw 450 with the bars and pegs set to "giant balls". Ride daily an extra 2 hrs. That should start the nad regrowth. Your welcome ,Dr Tonewall
Joe and DJ buy his kids some dirt bikes for Christmas. That way he has to "take the kids riding" on Sunday. At least then he comes to the track, pounds a few laps and beers, kids get to ride or play and his beetch gets to drive around and shop all day. Hide his cell while he's out on the track. Win-win-win.....
@pizzacorner.......liberal? does that political crap ever stop in your head. its a motorcycling column ...give it a rest.
What makes you think Elton John would want anything to do with Pingree?
I think he has higher standards?
As for pussification, buying a new KTM and leaving parked in the garage, is like buying a condom, if you ain't gonna take it out and use it from time to time, you just wasted your money.
@Welker- ease up on the MD2020!
Oh no! Ryan Hughes is angry! Let's all hope he doesn't try to fight and end up getting beat down and screaming like a girl...
@Dak446........LOL!
Actually Sir Elton is "bi" not "gay", and would probably arm wrestle with Ping to get at Jen, not that she would care much about either of them, having been with Brad.
@Welker: That's because you are a bigot.
Ok Welker, there on you! I want to hear a good Christmas story this year!
im thinking that Welker was just joking and ribbing the overly sensitive ones on here. i always try to give the benefit of doubt. but hell whom am i , but a person that would have no trouble turning my back on elton and taking my chances just to do my business with jen
Hey all thanks for the comments?? I was just going along with Ping's turbin stuff. but the story is pretty much true. exept for the candy cane stuff. See ya never know when ya are gonna get someone upset.
Ya as I have said before the heck with the PC stuff.
@ czmark so ya remember my Chiristmas story from last year?? that is funny. I will se what pops into my head on Christmas morning.
If it were totally true about Elton, then Ping would only need to wear his jockstrap/atheletic supporter on backwards to neutralize the situation. Then if Sir Elton came a knockin, in an attempt to put his cokckin, he'd just leave and go back to rockin, wanting a man in his christmas stockin.
e=mc2
Ping=Common Sense