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Ask Ping!

Friday, September 30, 2011 | 1:00 PM
Dear Ping,

The other day I was minding my own business commuting home from another day at work with my favorite tunes working when my serenity is busted by the egregious racket coming from a straight-piped Harley coming up beside me in the next lane. The traffic soon stopped at the next light. As I looked over to observe the source of the noise, I notice a middle-aged, overweight guy in a zip-up hoody sweatshirt, no helmet and get this... a set of earplugs in. My question for you oh wise counselor is: Why are the goons who ride such public nuisances so damn clueless? If he doesn't want to hear the melody made by his straight-piped, iron lung twin, why does he want to share it with everyone else?

Neil from Minnesota

 

 

Dear Neil,

There are few things more annoying than one of your jagoff neighbors firing up his Harley at 5:30 a.m. to head off to work. It’s annoying enough out on the surface streets and highways, but disturbing my sleep is completely unacceptable. The same people who pay an exorbitant amount of money for a Harley just because it is a “Harley” will argue that the loud pipes are a safety device that allow people in cars to hear them, since they are often lost in blind spots. That’s a terrific argument, but maybe they are just being run over because they are riding like jackasses and splitting lanes like they own the entire road. Is that possible? I’m convinced that this situation is no different than the guy with the gigantic, lifted truck that is clearly compensating for average-sized genitals. That same guy picks up the loudest, most obnoxious bike he can find so that everyone will look at him and be impressed with his new sunglasses and the sweet tribal tattoo around his bicep. You’re awesome, bro. I suggest the next time one of these guys pulls up next to you or rides next to you on the freeway, just blast your horn and don’t let off until he’s gone. I know that’s what I do when I’m driving my massive, lifted truck around.

PING

 

Dear Ping,

Myself and two buddies just bought dirt bikes this year and are cleaning up pretty good in the C class on sandy tracks. Seeing Kuwait ride this year at the MXoN was pretty inspirational and it got us thinking: If the three of us moved to a country and became citizens in, say, Yemen (we want to get a head start on riding in sand), do you think we could ride in the MXoN at Lommel next year and battle with team USA? We could be Yemenese (sp?) heroes.


Sincerely,

Luke

 

 

  • Yemenese Monster Energy girls. Maybe you should rethink your plan?
Dear Luke,

Yemenese heroes. I don’t think it’s accurate [Yemenite?] but it rolls off the tongue nicely and, frankly, it would be something great you could talk about at parties. You don’t hear of many heroes coming out of the Yemen area. In fact, the only time I’ve ever heard the country talked about was on an episode of Friends where Chandler was trying to get away from that girl with the annoying voice so he told her he was moving to Yemen. Sorry, my wife bought the entire Friends series on DVD and I’ve logged some legitimate hours watching that program. Here’s the kicker, Luke: You guys aren’t making the ‘A’ final at MxoN, which means you are more likely to be battling with the boys from Kuwait and the semi-American Puerto Rican team than the best from the U.S. Still, it is an ambitious goal you’ve set and I support you 100 percent. One quick suggestion: Be sure to pack shovels with you to the race next year so when you plant yourself in a deep, Lommel sand whoop your buddies can dig you out. Good luck.

PING

Ping,

Regarding Dungey’s shocking move to FuX riding gear recently, this type of branding seems to be trending. I haven’t seen any of the pros wearing any of the SHIT racing gear I spotted on my friend Fred recently, but…


Bruce Lyttle

 

 

  • So innappropriate
Dear Bruce,

Okay, now this is just getting ridiculous. Yet further proof of the deterioration of the moral fabric in our society. I’d be nauseated with disgust if I didn’t find both the FuX and SHIT gear a little bit funny.

PING

 

 

 

Got a question for Ping? E-mail him at [email protected].

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The Conversation

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rg807 wrote: 1:09pm September 30, 2011

Start the loud pipe argument now! Loud pipes do nothing to save lives because the sound waves are traveling behind the rider. In other words the car idiot won't hear you until after he's pulled in front of you, your bike flipped over his car, and then only if your bike is still running while it is laying on its side and if the pipes are pointed at the moron in the car.

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BobTheBuilder wrote: 1:23pm September 30, 2011

Sooooo many idiots on Harleys now. If you are one of those guys who rides everyday in rushour, crusing in someone's blind spot then its only a matter of time. Do the rest of the world a favor and don't let anyone talk you into getting a helmet.

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garet821 wrote: 1:52pm September 30, 2011

rg807, as much as I hate loud pipes and Harleys, sound waves travel in all directions. You will hear a rider behind you, unless he's traveling faster than the speed of sound (dependent on temperature and air pressure). The sound will be perceived as a higher pitch due to wave compression known as the doppler effect, then lower as he passes. This is the same phenomenon experienced when you hear an ambulance drive by. Just thought you might like to know.

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BD25 wrote: 1:54pm September 30, 2011

I have to admit, when in my car, I can hear some Cruisers coming up from behind me and long after they pass me letting me know they are in the area. I give them the start of an arguement however if saftey is part of the objective they could also take the MSF Rider Course or perhaps were a helmet and proper apparel. I do ride a V-Rod with after market pipes, they are baffelled as to be louder than stock, yet not offending. I have been riding all my life yet still took them MSF course and be darned if I didnt learn a thing or two.

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fred wrote: 1:59pm September 30, 2011

Hahahahah!!!!!! Shit raceware.How appropriate because most of todays gear looks like shit.

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RacingfortheSon wrote: 2:01pm September 30, 2011

I do wish Harley could build dirtbikes again. Eveyone knows that would be cool. A true HD motocross bike.

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ride111mph wrote: 2:03pm September 30, 2011

I WANT THAT TEE SHIRT!!!!! I MIGHT GET INTO A SCRAP WHEN I WEAR IT INTO THE HARLEY SHOP, BUT IF I GET MY ASS KICKED IN THE HARLEY SHOP MY TAX BRACKET WILL BE MUCH HIGHER WHEN I OWN IT.

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racer911 wrote: 2:04pm September 30, 2011

You know what else would save lives?... Riding sober, but I guess you have to be pretty hammered to be seen on a Harley. There was an excellent documentary on Harley riders that I found to be both informative and hilarious... It was on an episode of "South Park".

Also, way to deliver Ping. I was getting a little nervous that you were not going to post an article today. You have been a staple to my Friday's for quite a while, Thanks!

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ride111mph wrote: 2:04pm September 30, 2011

HARLEY DIDN'T BUILD THE MX BIKES. NEVER WILL. HP TO WEIGHT WOULD ONLY GIVE A 450 18 HP.

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MustardDog wrote: 2:12pm September 30, 2011

so much hate for the Harley rider... makes me want to set off car alarms and blast your windows that much more. I like riding all my bikes- deal with it.

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texvet230 wrote: 2:13pm September 30, 2011

love the T-shirt!!!

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Jake511 wrote: 2:55pm September 30, 2011

Thank you garet821 for explaining that so I don't have to. Physics is not just a river in Egypt.

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jd805 wrote: 3:52pm September 30, 2011

Good ones, Ping! Love the T-shirt...
It's that faux Harley attitude that the suburbanite takes on after overpaying for a under-performing motorcycle that is soooo anoying.

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rg807 wrote: 4:17pm September 30, 2011

garet821- while it is true that SOME of the sound waves travel in all directions it is more accurate to say that they are directional. It is the reason there is a "sweet" spot with a stereo, or the reason that standing behind a doofus on a Harley while he hammers his throttle sounds louder then standing in front of it. Another great example is an airplane flying towards you and the increase in sounds as it passes overhead.

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crs32 wrote: 4:17pm September 30, 2011

Love it when the toddlers are asleep in their car seats and a really cool guy on his really cool bike blasts by... Thanks asshole!!!

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laidbacklenny wrote: 4:29pm September 30, 2011

I think it's spelled "Yemenies". Back when I was there in 1984 it might have been "Yemenees"- but they didn't hate us as much back then. My point? Back then a kid showed up on a beat down Yamaha MX80. Lever perches welded on the handlebars- He was BADASS! He rode up to the local swimming hole, dunked a bunch of kids, and blasted off into the desert jumping every sandpile in sight. Look out if those people get there thobes in a row!

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motoman287 wrote: 4:39pm September 30, 2011

What a bunch of whiners...

Funny how some seem to think that everyone with a Harley automatically possesses a certain attitude, drinks and rides, and replaces their pipes with the most obnoxious thing they can find. I happen to ride a Harley, and don't do any of the above. I took the safety course, too.

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iloveyoulongtime wrote: 4:44pm September 30, 2011

Ahh, YES, harley DID build MX bikes!

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rjschad wrote: 4:49pm September 30, 2011

@garet821- Your right, its called the doppler effect.

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MustardDog wrote: 4:59pm September 30, 2011

motoman287- agree. Also, this same type of whining about noise is what gets MX tracks and open areas closed down. but none of these people crying about loud Harley pipes are running the quiet silencers on their 450's. bit hypocritical

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sledhead344 wrote: 5:03pm September 30, 2011

hardlys are complete overprice garbage the trottle is really just volume control and if you didnt get a crecent wrench necklace and tattoo kit you got screwed ,the foot pegs are for standing on to look for all the bolts that vibrated loose and rolled into the ditch .

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fred wrote: 5:18pm September 30, 2011

Boo hoohooo lets cry about the harley riders with their loud mufflers and cutoff FUX and SHIT Raceware.Boohoohoohoo!

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Bear wrote: 6:08pm September 30, 2011

Re the loud pipes thing : Anyone remember the South Park episode that dealt with that ?- an absolute classic.

As for Yemen - check out the troubles within Yemen, As a westerner, especially a US one, it's not the place to be.

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CZmark wrote: 6:26pm September 30, 2011

@Fred, I knew you were lurking around out there. All that thalk about Harleys and fat chicks in tube tops with butterfly tatoo's made you home sick for tons of fun!
Those Yemen Monster girls look sweeeet! lol

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CZmark wrote: 6:32pm September 30, 2011

@jaimeriviera227- they also built the Baja 100 back in the early 70's when they where owned by AMF.

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MXPete450 wrote: 6:35pm September 30, 2011

Sorry Ping.........ur column has become lame. If I had ur sense of humor I would be in a coma!

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WFO_UFO wrote: 6:38pm September 30, 2011

I disagree on the 'anti-Harley' sentiment. In my town, there are bikes on the road year round, and the ones who pi sss off the car drivers, are the 'college boys' with thier 20k crotch rockets, arrogantly weaving in and out of traffic, and splitting lanes like they own the road. I myself have put 70k miles on a road bike in this town, and people would litrerally try to kill me every single day, sometimes smiling at me as they were doing it. The ignorant/arrogant people give ALL motorcycle riders a bad name, and I will laugh my as sss off when they wrap themselves around a telephone pole eventually, because they deserve it.
As far as the intentionally loud pipes go, its no different than the guy at the intersection, who has his 'hip-hop' song blaring at full blast, with those expensive sub-woofers, and all of his windows down. Its all pure arrogance anyway. Most Harley riders don't stand out at all, except for thier attire, which reflects their chosen brand. I rode a Honda, not a Harley, but I respected the Harley's, way, way more than the little rich punks on thier expensive crotch rockets, which were financed by thier daddy's money. The Harley riders were FAR more responsible people.

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MXPete450 wrote: 6:44pm September 30, 2011

@WFO UFO.......your post definitely has some good points!. One thing I have never understood though is why do the loudest vehicles on the road generally have the least hp/torque? Shouldnt it be the other way around?

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MXPete450 wrote: 6:50pm September 30, 2011

A stock Harley cant be pumpain out more than 80-100hp stock, but they sound like they have Sh&% loads of power. Anyway....why am I talkin about Harleys on an MX site? My apologies!!!!!!!!!!

All motorcycles rock!!!!!!!!!!!!

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WFO_UFO wrote: 7:20pm September 30, 2011

Harleys aren't the fastest, or the best, but from an inside source, they are the cheapest to own and operate. But, I also hear that the sales have diminished in this country, due to the "out-dated-ness' of the Harley image, in the minds of the 'american' public, who mostly choose to drive a foriegn car. I am from DETROIT, and I drive a CHEVY. ( I have owned Honda, Suzuki, Kawasaki, and Yamaha motorcycles, because there is not that much' Harley' racing in MX). I rode a Honda road bike, because I never wanted to be a part of the Harley image, and I got a GREAT deal on the bike- $525 for 70k miles of reliability.

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redrider24 wrote: 7:57pm September 30, 2011

I've had numerous POS Harley riders try to start crap with me just because I was on a Honda. My response: My Honda may "burn rice", but it eats Harleys!
If I paid $20k for 1969 era performance, I guess I'd be a jackass too.

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WFO_UFO wrote: 9:29pm September 30, 2011

According to my inside source, the parts are cheap and readily available for that very reason. The outdated 'performance' means that the parts are very interchangable, across a wide span of years. They generally do not end up in junkyards, like an old 'jap' bike would. But I agree, that some of the Harley riders DO have that anti "rice-burner" attitude.

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bd200 wrote: 8:29am October 1, 2011

I dont know where some of you clowns get the "20K" dollar Harley tag from, but three years ago I had the chance to buy a new Harley Sportster with only 256 miles on it and it was a 1200 for only 7900 bucks, and it was at the dealer. Get a clue. But I love my current Harley so I didnt buy it. But I do agree about the loud pipes, they are very annoying.

@Ping, I have to disagree about one comment you made, the guys splitting lanes and buzzing through traffic like they own the road are always the stupid kids on the Jap crotch-rockets, not the Harley guys. And I didnt buy my Harley for an exorbanet amount of money, and not "just" because it was a Harley, because it was the best cruising street bike out there. Go USA, have pride.

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bigtireguy wrote: 9:34am October 1, 2011

i'm a little confused here, we are always under attack because of people who don't understand our great sport, (Land closures etc..) and now somebody has to snivel about a fellow rider because he cant hear his Justin Beiber CD?? I ride a Harley Ultra Classic, I paid 30K (It has a lot of extras) It is louder than stock, But who Cares?? I traded my Honda VTX in because I wanted the Bagger! It will hold its value WAY more than any Jap bike, Which is one of the reasons I went with the Harley. Not every fan of MX/SX is a 20 year old, tattoo'ed, face-pierced, saggy pants wearing punk.

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GraciousOne wrote: 9:35am October 2, 2011

To ALL of the Harley riders who posted on this thread - whether you have loud pipes, quiet pipes, whether you took a riding course or not, blah, blah blah - one thing is true for all of you - your bikes SUCK. They are overweight, underperforming pieces of crap. You do realize that Halloween is only once a year, right? So leave the "Easy Rider" costumes in the garage, o.k.?

And the crotch rocket hate is hilarious. What has more in common with an ultra lightweight, pared-to-the-bone MX bike - a Harley or a crotch rocket? Hmmm.....let me think. Motorcycles are about performance. Are there pleny of jackasses on crotch rockets? Hell yeah. But it's not the fault of the bike. You could put the nicest guy in the world on a Harley, and it's still a piece of garbage.

And for buddy that bragged about getting his Harely for $7900 - you got ripped off too. If you pay any more that $11.50 for a Harley (what you would get for the scrap metal) you were ripped off.

And bigtireguy - the only reason that Harleys hold their value so well is that there are a bunch of fools willing to pay so much for them. I once saw a news article about a painting of two dots that sold for $300K. Was it worth it? NO! Just because someone was willing to pay that doesn't mean it's worth it.

You guys have fun riding in your fringed chaps. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!

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BobTheBuilder wrote: 1:08pm October 2, 2011

Isn't the sportster the entry-level model intended for women??

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bd200 wrote: 3:11pm October 2, 2011

First of all, I didnt get my bike for 7900, it was offered for that. If you like your cheaply built, all plastic, drop over half thier value as soon as it leaves the lot Jap crotch rocket, great. Have fun, I really dont care. I love my Made in the USA Harley, it isnt intended to be a drag bike or a race bike, its a cruiser and thats what I do with it. Its funny, it seems the plastic bike guys have problems with Harleys, not the other way around. It must be that big chip on thier shoulder that thier bike is cheap, they try to prove to themselves that it is better.
@BobTheBuilder, the only bikes "intended for women" is the 883 entry levels because the seat to peg distance is closer. You can get the Sportster with the 1200 and a farther peg to seat distance also. Some guys are just clueless, and still run thier holes. Just ride whatever you like and enjoy it, and quit worrying about what everyone else is doing.

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GraciousOne wrote: 3:44pm October 2, 2011

@bd200:

The level of engineering that goes into MX bikes and crotch rockets is so superior to that of Harleys that it's not even funny. Fact. Period.

The only people on this thread who are trying to prove anything about their bikes are the Harley riders.

Now you put on your fringed chaps, get your motor runnin', head out to the highway, and, uh, be born to be wild. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!

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WFO_UFO wrote: 6:22pm October 2, 2011

Now that wasn't very 'gracious', GraciousOne

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WFO_UFO wrote: 6:25pm October 2, 2011

BobTheBuilder -that would be the Honda 'rebel 250.

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motoman287 wrote: 8:25pm October 2, 2011

I don't think anyone's trying to prove anything about their bikes. Everyone has their preferences. As for a Harley being old/outdated, of course they are. If I was after performance, I would have bought a performance motorcycle (and that's actually what my DRZ400 super moto is for). I've got no problem shelling out $10,000+ for a Harley that'll still be worth far more in a few years than, say, a brand new 1000cc rocket should I want to sell at some point later on.

I must have missed the memo about Halloween. Since when did wearing leather become uncool? Tell that to all the sportbike riders in full A-stars gear running down the freeway then. What should we all be wearing, GraciousOne? Shorts and a T-shirt? Get real.

Whether it makes any rational sense at all is besides the point, Harleys hold their value better than the "far superior, technologically advanced" jap bikes. Fact. Period. Maybe it's because there's a bunch of fools out there willing to pay so much for them, but again, the fact is, those people are out there, and until they're not, a Harley will always be worth more than your high performance bike a few years from now.

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bucky394 wrote: 8:49am October 3, 2011

Once again, many interesting points of view. Not to pick on anyone but ever since H-D went to Showa forks, Mikuni EFI (Mikuni is not a suberb of Millwaukee) and shall we say Asian electronics, we don't really hear the USA built claim as much, nor do we hear the "Harley Fart", you know the backfire that comes out of nowhere. And the guy from Detroit with the Chevy must have forgotten that they gave away tons of jobs to other countries, but why wouldn't he feel good about continueing to support them? Um...The only American made bike that comes to mind would be the Boss Hoss. Built in Mn. with V-8 motors. A guy in the next town has one with over 900HP on nitrous. You people haven't heard loud until you see this mad man do a burnout with that!! No helmet (no brain) but you hear it and he is just gone. Not for me but a very impressive display of power. And good old USA homeland technology. The cost makes a H-D look cheap. They are cool.

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Smiter wrote: 10:09am October 3, 2011

Simple challenge to all the dumbass know it all's. Go ride a quiet bike and then run your mouth. If you have, you would know you are forever getting run off the road. Its real.
Its not made up.
Go experience it!
Every time you get near a car in traffic you are wondering if they have seen you yet.
No hardcore riding required.
OH, then run your mouth.
I ride an ignorant loud Suzuki Marauder. It gives me headaches1-4 rides. But i don't get cut off anymore.

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BobTheBuilder wrote: 11:44am October 3, 2011

I've done both. The danger is there either way - cars do not see you and some don't even look anyway. That is why I don't ride streetbikes anymore. Its rolling the dice if you ride in traffic.

The trend now is inexperienced Harley guys just wanting to be cool that have no business being on a bike, out there with the people who are completely oblivious of their surroundings in their cars.

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Waldo wrote: 8:51pm October 3, 2011

Not a big Harley fan - love crotch rockets - race bikes with lights. Very fun to ride. Anyone who says they are cheaply built - plastic - POS - etc is not paying attention of just has Jap-hate thing goign on i guess. I knwo BD knows better, you just got his dander up. He wants a crusier not a racer, and HD makes a dang good one. And whether some guys on her ehtink so or not - or think worth it or not - no arguing they hold their value better. And man, that Harley XR is pretty stinkin cool...

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bd200 wrote: 9:09pm October 3, 2011

@Waldo, I have seen way too many "crotch rockets that are only a few years old for as little as 2000 bucks. My sons two best friends just each bought a couple. And they are practically ragged out, just not worth much anymore. I love my dirt bikes, have had one from each manufacturer over the years. My favorite is my KTM 200 , its got the best quality parts. The Jap bikes have too many cheap parts. Like the pegs, and practically all the bolts, just cheap junkl. And you are right, I want a cruiser for the street, Harley makes the best one there is, and yes I have had others, and they had too many cheap parts. Just like all Japanesse bikes. And too me, there are a few crotch rocket guys who have a little chip on thier shoulder and have to try and prove how cool and bad thier bike is compared to the Harley. Go ahead, you will grow up someday and not really care what others think. While you do that, I will be cruising on my Harley, enjoying myself.

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Rooster409 wrote: 12:36pm October 5, 2011

I frequently ride a Harley and a MX bike. No matter how annoying people may think the sound of my pipe is, I know for certain that it has saved my butt more than a few times. I've borrowed bikes without pipes when mine is in service and it is shocking the difference in how many people notice you.

Maybe, turn your radio up a little louder for a couple seconds so I don't interrupt your favorite Taylor Swift song as I go by.

You have to acknowledge that you may be a little annoyed for a few seconds, but I could be dead for a lot longer.

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